Ever (hic) wanted to know what the staff of the hospital used
to get up to when the patients weren't looking? Well, now you can
analyse their sordid outgoings with your own mental calculator - thanks
to one of our latest discoveries...
Click to enlarge, print, fill-in, cash
& spend, spend, spend!
ding dung - I've had a few moments spare and have been perusing the
contents of one of Ray's trusty foraging baskets, still full from
his May expeditions. My hands are feeling the itchings again. What
do they sprinkle over all the crap scattered about there? Probably
itching powder I guess.
leave an emplacement unitchified when retreating"
- Sun Tzu, The Art Of Vacating Medical Estabishments.
have come across and scanned (just for you) a blank cheque belonging
to the Per Pro Canadian Red Cross Memorial Hospital Staff Club.
I have a total of five blank cheques and many stubs. The remarkable
list of payees by the Staff Club is as follows:
- Gilbert Vintners (!)- £214.15
- Scottish and Newcastle Breweries (!!) - £54.35
- Latika Sports Equip. - £20.17
- Norwich Union Insurance Society - £3.20
- Peter Dominic Ltd - £48.92
- Carters Coaches - £16.40
- Scottish and Newcastle Breweries (!!) - £75.99
- Maidenhead district Table Tennis Association - £7.15
- Carters Coaches (to Richmond Ice Rink) - £8.04
- Gillian Roberts - £10.80 (paid for Asosa rink)
- Buckinghamshire LTA (Cliveden) - £46.20
- Peter Dominic - £39.25
- Scottish and Newcastle Breweries (!!!) - £70.58
- NVFIS (Norwich Union) - £11.90
- Shaw And Sons - Application for license - £45 (what kinda licence?
Booze probably, judging by events thus far)
- Peter Dominic - £118.87
- Sports-Drome Ltd (cancellation fee Arosa rink) - £5.40
- Clark Rd The Justices (?? - Aha! A later entry reveals all -'Coach
To The Justices' - The Justices is most likely some kind of drinking
establishment) - £1.00
- John Denyen Disco (Valentines Dance) - £20
- Bucks LTA Cliveden - £67.50
- Norwich Union Fire Insurance - £17.30
- W.P.H. Social Club - £135.94 (must have been a heavy night's
- Coach to The Justices - £1.00
- B.A.H.A (hehehehehe!!) Lighting of Social Hall - £183.27
- WPH Social Club - Pantomime Drinks - £34.79
Norwich Union Fire Insurance - £17.30
- WPH Social Club Dance Drinks - £89.09
- Cash (Chris Burke) - £25
- Wells & Co Ltd - Payment of Invoice No. 03707, 03708, 05104, 05396
- Saccone & Speed - payment of invoice 78763, 81098 - £357.16 (narcotics
- Courage (central) Ltd - £497.18 (glug)
- Kossway Auto CRC Stauke Box Rental: 5/12/77-31/1/78 - £66.33 (ripoff?
- Courage Central Ltd - £199.27
- Wells & Co Ltd - £15.88
- Kossway Automatics - £27
- Sonics HiFi (purchase Sony tape player) - £145.95
- Courage Central Ltd - £171.36
- Marley Home Care, Clearguard Carpet Protection - £10.63 (vomit?)
- FW Woolworth (tables) - £44.54
- William Wood & Son Ltd (4 trellis panels) - £18.65
- Miss B Byrne - repay deposit on social hall less extension of license
of £2.00 - £800
- Truman Ltd - £186.48
- Atrax Wholesale & Co Ltd - £102.24
So there you go. They were all pissheads with an occasional interest
in sports (probably as an excuse to get pissed), so it's quite a surprise
that the death toll of patients wasn't outrageously high as I expect
there were a fair few inebriated/hungover people working there at
much more to come from Ray's basket of goodies, but for now I shall
bounce away and clean my hands before going to play with some dough
for the marvellous pizzas I shall be creating this evening. Pass the
chilli and garlic. Aaargh
- so itchy. Its spreading, I'm getting strange tics (from ticks?).
Shower I need.
Damon adds: I wanted to get a more concrete idea of what these
figures actually mean to us today, so by using the converters from
History Services (whose website was down last time I tried it,
but it's allegedly still supposed to be in existence) on the alcohol
amounts alone for each year at the conversion rates for that respective
year (and adding the resulting subtotals together), I 've arrived
at the ultimate answer to the ultimate question for you. It's an astonishing,
though thoroughly genuine figure - made all the more impressive by
the fact that other literature indicates that hardly anyone was actually
in the staff club.
bottom line is this: Between 1974 and 1979, the CRCMH staff spent
grand total of at least £8412.06 in today's money
on booze. That's an average of £1682.41 per year (assuming that there
are no further account books for the same period that is, in which
case all figures here could skyrocket). Bloody hell - I think I'm
going to become a doctor. No wonder the place fell into disrepair
without anybody noticing ... (hic) ... pass the scotch, matron...